The struggles of being trangender in Christianity

This is an interview that I had with my very good friend Daniel, I had been friends with him for about two years and he has agreed to tell me his story for me to write in this blog in order for people to understand trangender individuals and their struggles in life. Daniel said that I was one of the few people that actually understood him because I am agender and that people needed to hear the side of the story that is usually not told because it is just a whisper among the many faiths that are clamoring that it is a sin.

Daniel was raised in an Apostolic Pentacostal Church and was there until he decided that path was not for him. In the Apostolic Pentacostal church the roles of males and females are really clearly drawn. Females are not to cut their hair or wear jewelry which Daniel thought this was wrong, he always thought that God would give him the body that he desired. When he was young he used to pray ferociously that his body would grow into a male’s body just like all his friends. He used to be a female and because he was a female he understands issues that concern females like shopping for bras and how problematic it can be.

He quit the church at the age of 19 after he struggled with the fear that his soul was going to end up going to hell but he knew that it was not a choice, if he had a choice he would accept the fact that he had a female body and act like how females are socially thought to act. But since it was not his choice because his soul was a male he decided to quit a belief that did not match with his soul.

When he was in college he was able to find out the many parts of what made up the LGTB community. He realized that he was trans when he was the age of 24, he also realized that he was aromantic until later on. In college he was able to find people like him and actually feel like he actually belonged. He was able to have a relationship with a boyfriend, who was also going through self discovery of who he was. But even through transgender people are an important part of the LGTB community many people even in the community do not understand it.

Daniel changed his name in 12/2013 became legally a male in this year but it has been a battle for him to pass as a male and he has started to take testosterone on 09/2013 as well to help him in his journey to feel more comfortable in his skin. Although many people who had started to take testosterone have mentioned that it can take a few years for the effects of testosterone to show up. Although Daniel has had facial hair show up and his voice starting to change and he had surgery on his chest to reduce them it is still hard for people to refer to him as sir instead they use “ma’am”.

His family too have had a hard time referring to him by his name Daniel as well as his gender pronoun, which is male. Daniel’s family was not fair to him they end up referring to him as female all the time and by his old name. His cousin actually did not want any of her children’s pictures to be shown in Daniel’s profile because she was afraid that the LGTB community were perverts. His cousin eventually told him that she would allow him to see his nephews and nieces but to not tell them at all what he was or why he was transitioning even if the children were curious to know why their “aunt” chose the name Daniel or Dan. But his aunt also though that just by him being around the kids he would confuse them after he became transitioning. They refused to still refer to him as Dan or Daniel and also to understand that transitioning was the only thing keeping Daniel from committing suicide. But transitioning was not an over night thing for Dan he had been contemplating it for many years. He was depressed of being in a female body he wanted to try at least to take the hormones to help him get facial hair and more testosterone in his system than estrogen.

His family still kept calling him by his female name was he kept transitioning, Daniel told them that it would be dangerous if they called him in public by his female name and female pronouns because someone would try to harass him or even try to beat him. Because they refused to respect his wishes he preferred to keep them in a non contact list. The reason why they did not respect his wishes was because of their Christian religion but even so they did not hold the ” treat others as you want to be treated” . Their family believed that it was a Spirit that ended up getting into Daniel and that Spirit would end up getting stuck into the children.

It was a huge struggle for him to get his documents changed from female to male, and still getting people to talk to him as a male and other males to accept him as such. In order to get his documents changed he had to get a psychiatric letter but in order to do this he head to search for a psychiatric to do that and go through therapy which was 3-4 months but the psychiatrist told Daniel to a therapist that reported to the psychiatrist, which meant he had to see the psychiatrist twice. Once the psychiatrist agreed Daniel had to get an appointment to go to the endocrinologist in order to get his testosterone but they told him that it would take a year for him to start his treatment of testosterone. It also have cost $150 dollars to get the court date to change his name not only on his license but his Social Security card. The wording from the letter of his doctors had to be exactly right for the court to accept it.

What Daniel wants the world to know is that it is not easy to be stuck in the wrong body, these last words are from Daniel, ” Yes. I wouldn’t chose this. I prayed God make me “right” and “good” “what He wanted me to be” but my feelings never changed. I was very dedicated to Christianity when I was saved and still God changed nothing.


Empathy, something I feel but limited.

I realized that a lot of my posts sound like rants, that is because they are. I will try my best to just get my feelings out but in a more direct way, the best that I can. Empathy is something that I do feel but not towards people that have placed themselves in their own situation. For example, I have heard of people having children that they knew were sick and knew that their children would die before they see their first birth day. I feel sadness for the child since it had to suffer for having such “parents” and the selfishness of these people did not let them see past the taboo that is around abortion and instead they chose to let the child become some sort of freak show. I understand that there are people that do not have enough money to afford an abortion and that with a few operations their child can live a functional life, just like what happened to Lakshmi Tatma. That little girl was born with 8 legs yet the condition was able to be fixed.

I also do not understand what is the issue with so many “parents” who, I will decide just out of the trying to be a decent human, and having a bit of empathy towards those people that actually chose to breed and are responsible to just use the term breeder for those people that are not responsible at all, that are harming their offspring, and giving real parents a bad name.

But let me tell you, if a parent really loved their child they would rather them suffer minimal in the womb and abort them if they were not going to have the most fulfilled life possible, if there was no way of fixing the issue. But we have found ways to fix a lot of issues that we were not before, now children born without limbs can have prosthesis and they are able to have a good life, what I am talking is about rare things like a child born without a brain ( which has happened), there was also this child that was born without eyes although if the child is intelligent enough it can be taught braille but I believe that child in particular it’s brain was faulty too, he is going to depend on his “mother” forever. My issue is, what happens after the guardian dies?

There are also breeders that have offspring and they end up killing them, I do not understand, if they do not want them why did they have them? I believing in less suffering and to be honest since I am an antinatalist I believe humanity should stop breeding until most of our problems are fixed.

I do not feel sorry for those people that end up getting pregnant in order to keep their partner with them. I do not feel sorry for those women that have multiple kids from different parents and are unhappy because they brought that unhappiness to themselves. I also do not feel empathy for those women that are drug addicts, smoke, and drink while they are pregnant and then wonder why their kid came out wrong. I also have no empathy for those that know their child will come out with issues that modern medicine cannot fix yet and decide to give birth to them, I am not going to throw a pity party at such people.

It has also been proven that the more children you have the lower your IQ is. So, I decided to express exactly why I sound like I am ranting most of the time.

Unconditional Love…It’s bullshit.

One of my friend’s gave a go at this topic before but he spoke about relationships, if you want to read why Unconditional Love is bullshit when it comes to relationships you can go here ( “
But me being a hardcore childfree person will take this idea a different type of way, the view of breeders claiming that the biggest love that there is out there is the love they have for a child. “Once you have a child you will know what true love is, unconditional love.”

Let me tell you that is the biggest BINGO and bullshit I have ever heard, if such a thing were true then there would not be Filicide, which means the deliberate act of a parent killing their child. Now, we all have heard of Ross Harris that killed their child in a hot car in Georgia and he was googling childfree and even went into our reddit forums we are not allowed to go into our safe haven because some asshole decided that he was not happy with the life that he chose when he fathered that child and was researching about childfree life style. Which in case that asshole did not know he was not going to be childfree because he had birth a child and nothing would change that. I am glad he got sent to jail. The point being here is that the love that a “parent” has for a child is not unconditional that something magical doesn’t automatically turn on in people when they have children. That “God’s love” is not surrounding such people and they are living fairy tales in the Enchanted Forest once they have children.

No, shit becomes real. People realize that they have bills to pay, if they have no health insurance they have to pay at least 40,000 in fees to the hospital if they live in the US. They also have to pay around 245,340 ( ) because of these thoughts and perhaps the fear of raising a child, also some people are raised in broken homes and according to statistics people who go through abuse are bound to abuse. Some people like that Slovak couple that gave Crystal Meth to their child to shut it up, or the father that let their child starve because he was busy playing a video game, if the love a parent has for a child is all forgiving, unconditional then why did these people not get the memo?

Perhaps, my method of showing that natalist are wrong once again is not the best but just turning on the 6’oclock news if you have any bit of logic left you can see it with your own two eyes.
Everyone needs to know and needs to be alright with the fact that not everyone is meant to be a parent, because of that people have to know that there is an option to not have children. There needs to be birth control and education in order to try to keep these deaths lower than they are now.

I am hardcore childfree not poser childfree.

I am hardcore childfree not poser childfree.

I am writing this because there needs to be someone finally who sets things straight. There are some people in the childfree community which like kids, so much that they date or marry people who have them, at times these kids live with them other times they do not. I have to set the record straight, not all childfree people are posers like this, I am one of those that are not posers but true childfree people Hardcore Childfree. People like me may or may not hate kids but regardless of that they will not adopt, step, or even dream of having a home with a breeder, yes, a person that has children 9 times out of 10 will be a breeder. After all we seen the decline of true parenting with strict laws and people were responsible for their offspring. Now a days basically anyone as soon as their clock starts ticking wants to have children.

I personally am sick of having to sharing the label childfree with breeder pleasers and I am sick of people having to hide their opinions about how the natalist religion has taken hold of society. I am not afraid any more to express my distaste even if such opinions can have huge repercussions. I hear endless childfree people in the groups on Facebook complain that their partners have children, that they are not involved with them and therefore can use the name childfree. I call those posers just like when I was in high school not everyone that wore all black was a goth, I have the same ideas of these cf posers. Just because you can fill your mouth saying that you are cf because you do not have any role in this child’s life does not mean you did not chose to have potential drama issues due to the fact their lives could change forcing them into your house in the future. Or those that are already step parents and if both of their parents die most likely they will end up having to deal with the children.

I always been childfree but since my mother did not speak English, I was the guardian of my brother because I was the only person they could communicate with, and I am his sister! So, people who are step parents have the nerve to tell me that they have no role in the children’s lives? They house them together with their couple, if they have to pick the children up from school they will be referred as the guardian or the step parent which means that the school will address letters do you. That is a responsibility which a childfree person that does not step, adopt, or birth children will never have to deal with. There should be another label that separates us true childfree people from these posers that are just saturating our community. A group that is very breeder pleasure is Childfree Chicks Confidential and the funny part is that some of the members are not even chicks! They also allow breeders that are always bias and attacking hardcore childfree people.

“All you need is love.” Is what someone recently told me when I did not empathize with her drama after all she has a choice to cut the boyfriend that has kids that are treating him like some chauffeur. I told her that I was not stupid to put all my hopes in someone that has children because I know that is not a good stock and it has a lot of baggage. Hence, it is not worth the time and effort. She just kept saying that, when people fall in love it is different. That just reminded me of something I heard in the movie Her where they said love was “ a kind of like a form of socially acceptable insanity.” I have always been against many of society’s stupid norms mainly when it comes to gender and gender roles. Therefore, I will not be part of the statistics and picking up where the last partner failed. I also do not believe that monogamy is something that could be kept for long hence relationships end and people get divorced as well and eventually they end up finding someone else, such thing is not called monogamy it is serial monogamy but that is an issue for another article.

I am also sick and tired of breeders trying to hit on me online as if I would give up my freedom to date anyone of them. Automatically, when people say that makes them less attractive to me and less of a viable match. I will never date a breeder, I might date someone who is childless until it were not possible to deny the fact that they might eventually change to the point that they want to have children. Once things start leaning towards that way, I am the type of person that would completely cut the cord. To some people it is hard to know what they will want in the future but to me I know this for sure, I do not want to give my freedom to be with someone who has kids, wants kids, or wants to adopt kids in the long run. I am currently in the path of serial monogamy, where if things don’t work out it is better to go to the next one, but never settling for a straight jacket.

Gender & Sexual Orientation are something the Goverment should keep out from

I have no idea why even today in this time and age when we know that there is documented evidence that homosexual relationships have existed we still treat it as if it were a new thing.
People should not care the gender of the person they are with as long as that person is compatible with them mentally. I understand that people have sexual preferences and that some people tend to know if they are going to “fuck someone” as soon as they see them. I personally, do not understand the latter since I am demisexual, but again I understand the hormonal changes in the body and the eyes get wider and the smell that some people give end up making them seem more attractive to some and in turn their sexual attraction is turned on.

But to people like me that do not understand that type of attraction, I would describe myself as demisexual with capabilities of being panromantic, because I prefer men but I can be romantic with any gender. Yes, I said it, ANY!

I am sick and tired of having to explain that there is more than one gender and lack there of. Just like atheist are non believers of God and they are not theist, we have people who have no gender called agender (Neutrois) along with other names that you perhaps heard like:
Neither male nor female

They all fall in the genderqueer which means it is not binary, you know like the 1 and 0 your computer uses, it’s not that. It doesn’t limit itself to that, just like computers cannot understand feelings, most people that are in 1 and 0 cannot really understand what being genderqueer, or transgender is like. Transgender
( which yes it does exist) there are people that do not want to have surgery but they feel usually like a male or female and yet they feel they are in the wrong body, just like there are people who have ugly noses and don’t want to get them operated. I am agender and since that means having no gender there is no way that I can possibly get a surgery to match that, there are people who try though who try either by looking androgynous or some people get their genitals and breasts taken out. I say people because since there is no gender, I cannot say: he, she, or it. I hate when people use the word IT! Although, I am guilty of using it on babies, but simply just call the person by their chosen pronoun or name but if you don’t know that then just use them, they, you get the point.

The same goes to people who are transexual but that’s usually the physical aspect to it hence most transexuals get surgery or get hormones.

Phew, that was a lot to say!

In sexuality we have something very similar and you might have heard of this recently due to the fact there is more exposure to it now, Asexuality, which means that they do not have any sexual attraction at all it does not mean that they are celibate just like people who are nymphomaniac can have sex with people without loving them, or people who have one night stands or “hook ups”, DTF (Down to fuck), and so on so forth can sleep with a person that they 1) Hardly know 2) Don’t love, why do people think that one has to have sexual attraction to someone in order to have sex with them? Some asexuals do not feel comfortable with sex some do, some are sex positive some are not but it is based on the individual.

Therefore, the thought that one cannot have sex without love is false because people do it all the time, and the thought that people need to have sexual attraction in order to have sex and to love is also flaw. But like Genderqueer, Asexuality is an umbrella term it is a spectrum, from aromantic, romantic, grey-A, demisexual.

Aromantic people mainly have platonic relationships and they feel fulfilled by this, they are more interested in having a mental understanding with people rather than a romantic or a sexual one, gender usually does not matter to them as long as they get along with the person.

Romantic Asexuals can be hetero-romantic, bi-romantic, pan-romantic; this all means that they do not have a sexual relationship with their partners, some Romantic Asexuals chose to be monogamous others chose to live in polyamory, having more than one relationship at the same time. Some can be Demi-romantic which means that they experience romantic attraction after forming bonds with the people they know.


Do not normally experience sexual attraction, but do experience it sometimes
experience sexual attraction, but a low sex drive
experience sexual attraction and drive, but not strongly enough to want to act on them
people who can enjoy and desire sex, but only under very limited and specific circumstances

Demisexuals (which is the group I am in) only have sexual attraction to people that they develop bonds with. Hence, this group of people do not see someone and feel like they can fuck them at first sight. No, love at first sight either if we take all that into account.

The thing that most asexual groups have in common that we see people the same as cars, art hanging in a gallery, until we get to know people and develop feelings for them be it romantic or not. This does not mean that people have the right to tell us that we ” need to be fucked silly in order to love having sex”, or that we “have not found the right person yet.” All that is objectification of individuals which most Asexuals can see through the lies at how exactly human relationships are and point certain flaws in the system, just like Atheist can do the same with religious people. Both groups are needed because there are certain things built among these things that have impacted laws and the way which people live.

Although gender does not affect sexuality, or lack there of. I thought I should just basically give a bit more of an look into this world of no gender and no sexual attraction. I forgot to mention that people should be allowed to think freely and not be controlled by someone that does not understand their needs or how they feel about gender, who they love, and how many they love as long as it’s consensual and an intelligent decision by legal adults with legal adults! As we continue to evolve things are bound to change if you are limiting change then you are the limit that humanity has to over come and it will. Just like the culture changed through the years and countries and empires lost power so too will the holds of religion, sexual discrimination, and gender inequality.

You can believe in a Philosophy and not believe in Religion.

Lately, I been asking myself exactly where I belong. I know humans love labels we love to organize certain things in different places, but as years go by I end up learning new things and feeling closer to what I feel is how the world makes logical sense, I am caught between two parallels and even though they can seem a world apart to me they are kind of similar, as if there was a bridge between them. I am talking about Pantheism and Atheism since it is a Philosophy, I believe both of them are because Atheism is believing in no God and it doesn’t really seem all too organized like the Church of Scientology and such for example, since the Church of Scientology seems like a new idea, while Pantheism is pretty old as well as Atheism if I remember correctly.

But while a lot of people heard of Atheism, Agnostics, no one I really met has heard of Pantheism it really reminds me of when I was Wiccan but I would say I was Pagan, they did not know what to make of it because to them Wicca was seem as devil worship and Pagan they have not heard anyone describe themselves like that ever. I tend to like to mind boggle people and try to find where exactly my mind feels at ease at that moment, but just like with Christianity I started to question everything about Wicca even though some scientists have been able to levitate ( NOT Wingardium Leviosa from Harry Potter, I am a nerd, moving on) The link is here if you want to read more about the levitation of sound ( ) they show the video and explain it. Well I read in a book by Silver RavenWolf ( Yeah, I know that there are no holy books basically in Wicca mainly Grimoires and things which were taken from other Pagan cultures and put together wrapped in one religion that has a lot of branches in it and different ways to practice, as well as stories) but this particular story says:

Long, long ago, the world slept in the arms of the dark void.

From this place of nothingness, Spirit drew together and created Our Lady of Infinite Love.

The Lady danced among the heavens, Her feetbeating out the rythmn of all creation.- Silver Ravenwolf

Perhaps the turtle some cultures talked about really do not make any sense to me but when I saw these objects levitate because of sound that thought came to me, I just find it interesting that there are many things that cannot be explained and mainly in Wicca and Thelema have similar type of things, which all came from Pagan things, but the thing is that Christianity also came from Pagan traditions, Christmas December 25 when we all know that historians say it is impossible for the nativity scene to be like how it is painted on the Hallmart cards in Christmas time. We also know, at least you should know, that Christmas trees were basically a tradition brought from Germany based on the ideas of old gods and were seen as a Pagan influence by guess who? The Puritans who came from England running away from the religious persecution over there to the US, ironically they did not want to respect the traditions of other people. If it was not for Queen Victoria we would not have had them become the center piece of the celebration. (Don’t believe me about trees? Here is the link ) Not only that but other things from Paganism started to seep in the form of bits and parts from Sumerian texts and Egyptian text as well as other traditions like birthdays and Easter. Ever wonder why the bunny and the eggs are a part of Easter? It is because they both mean fertility in the old Pagan ways.

Jehovah Witness do not celebrate Christmas, Birthdays, or Easter because of the pagan traditions tied to them, hence when Christians start bashing Wicca, and all the branches of Paganism, I cannot help but laugh. I also went to a Latter Day Saints church and the only reason they gave me to celebrate the wrong date of the birth of Christ is “because it is a cultural norm.” Which I replied, “People have sex before marriage and the church condemns that, that’s a cultural norm now so should the church just allow it because that’s how people are now?” But this like many questions were dismissed. One of my Christian friends ( who I do love a lot but we don’t agree with certain things) told me that “You did not give Christianity a chance, you did not stick to it.”

Really now? A mental prison is something that I should stick with? I forgot what I answered back to her but it was filled with wit and we changed the subject. The same friend and me had a conversation in the car going to Walmart we talked about how I saw a movie in Mexico when I was younger called El Crimen Del Padre Amaro which basically is of a perverted priest that sleeps with this girl who is horny about Jesus, and he places a robe on her which was used to cover the Virgin of Guadalupe. She said, “that is blasphemous, why would you see that if you believe in God?” I told her I believe God is the universe and we are all part of the one but that’s a philosophy not a religion, I don’t agree with organized religion. Religion creates division and chaos takes us away from moving forward, and if I have to say my God would not be like the one in the bible.”
“What is your God like then?”
“One that doesn’t have a lot of hatred like the one in the Old Testament, I don’t even believe in the bible or any holy book, to begin with.”

Although now that I am not in the spot as I was then, because we were pretty close to a Prolifer, which I forgot who I was with and I ended up whispering, “Shhh! There is a prolifer there! I don’t feel like getting shot today.” She looked at me like, what the fuck? I am a prolifer. I had to explain, ” Look not every prolifer is open to agreeing to disagree, and moving the hell on from crap we don’t agree to stuff we do agree in. Plus people that think like me end up getting hurt.”

Which is true, but I am tired of being quiet! I see the patterns of certain things, I am trying very hard to understand the world around me and how hypocritical people can be but I am like, monkey see monkey do at times because I also end up putting that poker face and pretending that everything in life is peachy when it’s not. Theist and non theist people should look inside and really do a tally about their life and be honest about it and I am sure that for most people there are more sad moments than happy moments, which is expected because in order to be happy you have to have a unhappy in order to appreciate it, I get it. But I do not like seeing children in Africa dying while Mega churches in the States get fuller and fuller and these pastors have these jet planes and cars, what happened to the whole Camel and Needle thing from the bible?

And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.
-Matthew 19:24

I don’t believe in the bible but they sure do, and I know some people will say something like:

Thou believest that there is one God; thou doest well: the devils also believe, and tremble. -James 2:19

Funny thing is that I am concerned more about people than God, just like I am more scared of serial murders than ghosts. I also do not believe in hell or the devil, although I believe in the Spirit of Rebellion, which I will go more into that in another post. Now excuse me but I am mainly picking on Christianity because I have a first person point of view about it, I have never been a Muslim although I don’t agree with a few things about them, but since I never been to one of their mosques, although if they invite me just to see what one of their services is like I would go just to see, I am also not Hindu or ever been but once again, I only seen images about it from certain videos I looked at Youtube about Hare Krishna’s being popular in Mexico City. Since, I do not have read a their holy books and Christianity is the majority and there are a lot of things which are in Paganism and they act like they are really two separate things or like the devil made people change the days of the week and the months in a year because he wanted to deceive people as well as made parallels between Paganism and Christianity, which by the way Paganism excised a long time before Christianity. Do you math much? ( That’s just one example, there is another example of gods being created by Satan to deceive Christians which was made by someone very prominent said but it eludes me at the moment if you know who it is, totally tell me.

By the way, I am just an observer, I take mental notes of things hence details fade often but anyway I found this little gem online just now trying to find the quote where such guy says that satan basically went back in time.

Symbols of God’s creation misused by pagan systems

God created stars, trees, geometry, planets, lights, etc……everything that was created was and is good.

To let Satan have a monopoly over every symbol of God’s creation is wrong.

God made the trees. But since pagans use the symbol of a tree, so now we are told we cannot celebrate with Christmas trees.

God made the stars. But pagans use the symbol of a star, so now we cannot use stars, even though the star of Bethlehem was significant in Christianity.

God created light. But pagans use candles, so now we cannot light candles for prayer.

God created birds. But pagans use the symbol of a bird, so now we cannot have pictures of birds.

God created the sun and moon. But pagans worship the sun and moon, so now we cannot use sun and moon in our art. –

So, tell me what dull life you live that you are scared to even look at the moon?

Where, do I belong the path continues, I talk like an atheist, yet unlike atheists I have an idea that God is like the universe full of chaos yet I find beauty in it, everything fixes itself just like the universe that creates supernovas that explode and eventually new stars are created from them, we are all part of it and therefore, we must be united for we are all part of The One. I grieve and am sad for people that pass away but plants and animals do too, I mentioned this before. There is really no intelligent design there are flaws in everything. We are apparently supposed to be similar to God which means that we are all one and God has flaws too hence I see God as the Universe it something vast and beautiful with a lot of chaos. I do not see God as a person or anything like that I do not believe in a personal butler God I believe in medication and self coaching to get through things, that the spirit (life) that is around the Universe is shared by all and should be respected.
I have to say it but even cockroaches live long after their body is cut off.
If God favored us why did that happen? Why are pest like that capable of doing that, I understand it would be grotesque to see a human without a head and their body living for weeks like the Headless Horseman but still I wonder.

I also differ from some Pantheist because I am vegetarian. I believe in the Wiccan Rede “An’ it harm none, do what thou wilt.” or like Alister Crowley who was seem as the most horrible man on the face of the earth said, “Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law. Love is the law, love under will.”

To end, I do not know if I should join atheist, agnostic, or stuff like Godless Mingle since I am a Pantheist. I tend to be the type of person that as long as the philosophy sounds logical I will listen to it but I only like my fairy tales in books like Harry Potter and Twilight, I do not pray to them or to the Gods in The Game of Thrones.

(I feel content now, perhaps grammar is not the greatest but I feel it reflects what these bones feel.)

Spookyfurmommy no human children here just fur ones.

Do not go gentle into that good night” -Dylan Thomas

Yesterday, more like a few hours ago, I had coffee in Dunkin’ Donuts for free due to it being Coffee Appreciation Day or something like that, I must say that I enjoy the dark roast and I just had it with sugar, I opted out of creamer because it has dairy, I am vegetarian after all although I don’t mind cheese—go figure. I later found out by Justin, who informed me of such a marvelous event in the city of Wilkes Barre  even though it’s a nationwide thing, I was ignorant about it.) It was my first time meeting Justin face to face, we been talking in Facebook for a day and he asked me if I wanted to play scrabble which in the end ended up scrambling my brain.
Before I went to meet him I read his blog ( and a particular post caught my attention it was about God Is Not Dead ( however that is styled in actual text), which I will link here if you want to read it. (
Basically there were scenes in the movie which depicted people from other creeds as jerks and inconsiderate people and I really do not understand why it is so bias, it would be interesting to see other religions ( or lack there for) rebuking this movie, it would be a very interesting conversation on the big screen.  There should not be any favoritism to one religion over the other, it should be an equal playing field. I personally am not religious, I have a philosophy pantheism everything is apart of everything and we are all supposed to be united after all we are all part of the universe.  I don’t want to force such a view to other people but I do not want to be harassed for actually thinking and questioning things with random bible verses which mean nothing to me.
Needless to say that I lost by 400 points ore more, I am not good at strategy games basically I just rush into things.


After many sips of coffee, I felt that I finally understood what Amanda Hocking said about having coffee while she wrote novels inside of a cafe.  I honestly felt like that coffee really charged my qi with thoughts and ideas hopping all over the place, I once heard a quote by Eleanor Roosevelt, “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” Yesterday, I felt like one of those great minds because I was discussing ideas that I found interesting to me and how people are being tied down to old beliefs that do not help us in the evolutionary process. Justin said, “ some people do not even believe in evolution,” which made me laugh because it was true, to which I replied, adaptation. Basically to me at least evolutionary and adaptation mean the same, things need to adapt to their environment, birds of prey and so forth although humans see themselves separate from the circle of life but in reality we are part of it, we are not the masters of animals and the masters of the universe; if an animal lives by the rule that those that have stronger genes get to reproduce why do we humans think we can do otherwise?


I decided that I have been quiet too long observing humanity, perhaps like I would observe ants in an ant farm scrambling all around when certain things happen like water ends up messing their habitat and so forth. I must say that I am an antinatalist hence to me humanity should not be reproducing after all if you compare scans of cancers and the growth of the human population you see the parallels between both. People feel that such ideas like these are extreme and that animals tend to kill each other hence what makes it wrong for us to kill them, let me say this, I do not like the exploitation of animals, they kill them and they eat them. They do not lock them up in labs and do experiments on them, they do not create huge farms of their favorite animal to munch on like people do. If people are going to eat meat I am more pro hunting the animal yourself spending time in their habitat and then perhaps because your survival depends on them being alive and enough for humans to eat. Perhaps people would take care of the environment of the animals more. But humans have become domesticated, I personally do not hunt and I think it’s sad that animals die but there are millions of people that die every day and no one cries for them, “Oh, it’s just a part of life,” that’s exactly why I am an antinatalist because life is a cruel game and if people keep feeding the monster the cycle will just continue on going.


I heard some people say, “If people do not have children then the souls in the other veil will not be able to come into this life,” usually that ties down to religion, which I do not agree with it defies all logic. But if you look at Buddhism, even Buddha is said to have incarnated into animals so by that religious logic, I can deduce that even if humanity did not exist if reincarnation is true it will continue to happen.
Basically, in the end whether you care about the environment or not just know this, the reason why people are trying to be more green is because in the end the ones that will not be able to live here are us if we keep up intoxicating our environment, people can sell all they want for money but in the end money is not even 100% paper, it’s a mixture of things and because of that mixture of things as well as dividing humanity with religion which was created by people that wanted control of the masses people kill each other over these stupid things.


Hence, because of the meeting with Justin I realized that perhaps the idea about creating a blog rebuking certain things from the childfree/antinatalist/ non theist perspective was needed.  That a normal person actually can do something like that, this idea  I have been toying around for years actually came face to face with me.
Although, I must say that I am a special breed of childfree, I am hardcore childfree: step, adopted, birthed children are not for me. I also am a mixture of other philosophies and ideas which may differ from other childfree people but audience please remember that I am my own being there are no copies of me therefore, because I say something does not mean it is commandments of the childfree community or any community that I share certain attributes with.